One of the many pictures with messy hair and a dirty face, the better the reflection of how I felt after my Vision Quest in the desert: ! California, USA, 2017
I never understood this place, this world. And I certainly never understood people nor myself. This was frustrating because I have always been "blessed" with a massive curiosity on getting to know the soul of the world and my very own.
Five years ago, while working at a Forensic Intervention Team, I woke up one day feeling deeply tired. It was a tiredness that couldn’t be resolved with sleeping. Combined with an unsafeness and panic that couldn’t be softened in any way.
The ground beneath me, and inside of me, had gone. I was lost.
A few tough days later, when 'The Dark Night of the Soul' by St. John of the Cross showed up on my screen, my soul understood. This crisis was something that I needed more than anything. The mystery that I was always drawn to was ready to be experienced and embodied. This was the moment where magic made its entrance in my life. Due to my decision to start opening up to my own deepest fears and pains. It was time for truth and waking up to myself.
And so I took off on a personal adventure, my own quest, which had simultaneously
set off a long time ago.
I took this picture (above) in a little town in Central India and if you look closely you can see a woman in the fields (between the leaves). She is dancing but at the same time she looks back.
I see my own process of liberation in her. Wanting to dance and live freely and at the same time feeling pulled back by my own created prison (of fear, doubt, uncertainty, past, present, future). To me, liberation is an ongoing birthing process due to the deliberate choice for a true life and a true self. And for that, we also need to be open to the falseness of ourself and life.
Found on a 'invisible' spot at the magical Thor. Glastonbury, England, 2015
Below an impression of my background and experience.
I started roughly ten years ago exploring spirituality and myself. I gradually started feeling a growing desire and purpose to do this work myself, and I did.
Master's degree, Criminology
Casemanager, Forensic Intervention Team (FIT)
Coordinator, Dutch Council for Refugees (VWN)
Tibetan Buddhism Training, India
Year Training Quest to Self Remembrance, Netherlands
Vision Quest Training, Greece
Ayahuasca retreats/ceremonies, Portugal and the Netherlands
Priestess (sacred feminine) Training, England
Year Training (breathe- & bodywork, soul retrieval etc.) Sacred Voyage, Netherlands
Awakening Dakini (feminine) Power Training, Spain
Vision Quest Teacher Training, School of Lost Borders, USA
Currently guiding at ayahuascaceremonies/retreats, Netherlands
The Vision Quest will sometimes be carried by two guides. Below an introduction to another guide, Marloes Verboom. We met in 2014 where we both experienced our first Vision Quest.
We actually buddied up during our Quest and have been strongly connected ever since.
Me and Marloes in a cropcircle during our sacred journey in Avalon. England, 2015
Marloes in nature. Andalusia, Spain 2018
I live with my husband and daughter in Andalusia since 2009 on a sacred place in the mountains. We made a little detour to the Netherlands inbetween but we missed our place in Andalusia so much that we ended up returning. This detour however gave us more power and experience. We came back with an even clearer vision: to support people in getting closer to their nature by being present in nature. We do this by means of rituals and retreats that we create here. I feel at home in nature, I can fully be myself and I can connect with what is important to me. I love to create rituals in nature and feel the essence of life through them. I love to make fire and thereby firing up my inner flame. I love to dance, to feel my body, my womanhood, deep in my core. And I love to share all of this with others.
In 2014 I did my own Vision Quest which has given me so much. It allowed so much movement and change in my life. It was life changing because I could deeply connect to Mother Earth. I could deeply connect to its silence and it gave me all the insights I needed in that moment.
Because I feel the Vision Quest is so powerful and because it is my longing to let people get closer to theirselves we offer a Vision Quest this year in our area (Andalusia). During my Vision Quest in 2014 I met Inez and it showed that we immediately had a deep connection. After years of experience in nature we are both ready to offer a Vision Quest in the beautiful and wild nature in the mountains of Sierra Tejeda (Andalusia).